Titles and Insults

"Six feet from his head to his heels was all [the land] he needed."

"I’m hilarious. I’m not sure if you’ve heard me say that."
— 23 hours ago with 3 notes

theconsultingrenegade:

bestquius:

bestquius:

There’s this asshole who every time he sees me with my ukulele he thinks he’s funny and asks “Can you play any Metallica?” but the joke is now on him because I just learned how to play the intro riff to Master of Puppets.

I did it. I fucking did it. He asked me again just like I knew he would and I stared him straight in the eyes without blinking and just fucking shredded on my ukulele

image

(Source: meidosuji, via anonymoushippocampus)

— 1 day ago with 366321 notes

doubleohmogar:

franerys:

katiebpeters:

chloereneeeee:

How many altos does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
None, they can’t get that high.

How many sopranos does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

One, she holds it up and waits for the world to revolve around her.

How many singers does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. An alto to actually do it and a soprano to stand by and ask “isn’t that a little high for you?”

u wanna fucking go

(via anonymoushippocampus)

— 1 day ago with 61812 notes
tenshiko:

sushiandpie:

taco-bell-rey:



EXCEPT THIS ISNT JUST A FUNNY HAHA SILLY HEADLINE GUYS
this is really important and is a really great program that teaches skills to inmates and allows them to basically receive group therapy while they are simultaneously learning a craft
IT IS ALSO REALLY RADICAL BECAUSE IT BREAKS NOT ONLY THE STEREOTYPE THAT INMATES ARE INCAPABLE OF BEING DECENT HUMAN BEINGS WHO CAN TALK OUT THEIR ISSUES AND HEAL AND BE FUNCTIONING MEMBERS OF SOCIETY BUT IT ALSO SHOWS THAT TRADITIONALLY GENDERED HOBBIES LIKE KNITTING ARENT JUST “FOR WOMEN” AND ARE ENJOYABLE FOR EVERYONE.
here is an from the above article

They started by knitting comfort dolls, which they gave to children removed from their homes because of domestic issues. Then they moved on to hats for kids at the inner-city elementary school many of the prisoners attended, Zwerling says. “If you look at them, they’re covered with tattoos, they’re rough looking, and many of the young guys don’t have all their teeth,” she says. “But it doesn’t feel rough. They’re very respectful and grateful and very happy to knit.”

THEY KNIT COMFORT ITEMS FOR ABUSED KIDS. THEY KNIT HATS FOR INNER-CITY CHILDREN.
this is a good program and i really hope that people actually look into it rather than just posting the headline and a silly image attached ok
original article - x

Seriously go read that article. 

tenshiko:

sushiandpie:

taco-bell-rey:

EXCEPT THIS ISNT JUST A FUNNY HAHA SILLY HEADLINE GUYS

this is really important and is a really great program that teaches skills to inmates and allows them to basically receive group therapy while they are simultaneously learning a craft

IT IS ALSO REALLY RADICAL BECAUSE IT BREAKS NOT ONLY THE STEREOTYPE THAT INMATES ARE INCAPABLE OF BEING DECENT HUMAN BEINGS WHO CAN TALK OUT THEIR ISSUES AND HEAL AND BE FUNCTIONING MEMBERS OF SOCIETY BUT IT ALSO SHOWS THAT TRADITIONALLY GENDERED HOBBIES LIKE KNITTING ARENT JUST “FOR WOMEN” AND ARE ENJOYABLE FOR EVERYONE.

here is an from the above article

They started by knitting comfort dolls, which they gave to children removed from their homes because of domestic issues. Then they moved on to hats for kids at the inner-city elementary school many of the prisoners attended, Zwerling says. “If you look at them, they’re covered with tattoos, they’re rough looking, and many of the young guys don’t have all their teeth,” she says. “But it doesn’t feel rough. They’re very respectful and grateful and very happy to knit.”

THEY KNIT COMFORT ITEMS FOR ABUSED KIDS. THEY KNIT HATS FOR INNER-CITY CHILDREN.

this is a good program and i really hope that people actually look into it rather than just posting the headline and a silly image attached ok

original article - x

Seriously go read that article. 

(Source: literarynerd, via kazuhira-the-dongler)

— 1 day ago with 315783 notes
foreverpruned:

black-american-queen:

dapenguinninja:

giddytf2:

gyrojojo:

leylatimur:

yeeees
why is Ursula shunned from King Triton’s society? does it have something to do with being more powerful than him? why does King Triton have a magical trident, being otherwise a pretty regular merman? Ursula is a witch, if anyone should have a magical artifact it should be her, did King Triton steal it?
and finally, Ursula didn’t do Ariel much wrong
Ariel wanted some legs (and a vagina) and Ursula told her flat out that in the surface world you can have a vagina or a voice, not both
i’d watch the hell out of a movie about Ursula

“Ursula told her flat out that in the surface world you can have a vagina or a voice, not both”
ohhhh shit though, ursula was being too real about the world
although perhaps a bit too literal

Okay, these were all excellent points and I’ll never see The Little Mermaid the same way again.

I laughed at that caption at first then the reality actually hit me

you can have a vagina or a voice, not both”

foreverpruned:

black-american-queen:

dapenguinninja:

giddytf2:

gyrojojo:

leylatimur:

yeeees

why is Ursula shunned from King Triton’s society? does it have something to do with being more powerful than him? why does King Triton have a magical trident, being otherwise a pretty regular merman? Ursula is a witch, if anyone should have a magical artifact it should be her, did King Triton steal it?

and finally, Ursula didn’t do Ariel much wrong

Ariel wanted some legs (and a vagina) and Ursula told her flat out that in the surface world you can have a vagina or a voice, not both

i’d watch the hell out of a movie about Ursula

Ursula told her flat out that in the surface world you can have a vagina or a voice, not both”

ohhhh shit though, ursula was being too real about the world

although perhaps a bit too literal

Okay, these were all excellent points and I’ll never see The Little Mermaid the same way again.

I laughed at that caption at first then the reality actually hit me

you can have a vagina or a voice, not both”

(Source: tybalt-tisk, via gnarly)

— 1 day ago with 177051 notes
WHEN ONE IS EXPECTING

maliciaous:

imyourdestinymotherfucker:

Today, I bought this book (for my sister, lets clarify that now ‘cause the only way I’m going anywhere near sperm is if I fall into a vat of it):

image

BUT WAIT

THIS:

image

IS:

image

SOME:

image

OF THE BRILLIANT:

image

STUFF IT HAS IN IT:

image

WHAT THE HELL

(via kazuhira-the-dongler)

— 1 day ago with 134580 notes
"Act my age?
What the fuck is that, “act my age”?
What do I care how old I am?
The Ocean is old as fuck.
It will still drown your ass with vigor."
the greatest thing i have ever read (via seabelle)

(Source: howitzerliterarysociety, via kazuhira-the-dongler)

— 1 day ago with 948810 notes

pengwhat:

insanitybreach:

See this is actually a really neat look at how history works.

Who writes the history books?

The survivors.

Who survives?

The victors.

well

(Source: whitejadeflower, via kazuhira-the-dongler)

— 1 day ago with 144639 notes